Friday, July 8, 2011

STRONG at the BREAK by Jon Land ***

It's readable but geez what's with the noun fixation? Ever hear of a pronoun, Land? Every paragraph is Caitlin breathed and Caitlin saw and Caitlin walked and Cort Wesley this and that. Can't he be called Cort? Sick of Cort Wesley, I'm only on page 119 and if I were to have a drink everytime Cort Wesley's name came up I'd be drunk on page 3. Give it a rest, use; he, she, it. WTF.

That crap is so distracting I can barely tolerate the rest of the novel. The story is that some asshole teenager who's name you'll see a zillion times: DYLAN went to Mexico to find his dead girlfriend Maria Sancheza El Paso Sicko Full Namitosis. Daddy Ranger or whatever he is didn't tell him she's dead. Why? Stupidity. So now Caitlin, or Ranger, and Cort I'm sick of you Wesley are off on the chase. I almost wish they'd kill the kid, everyone could go home, get drunk and forget they have proper nouns in every paragraph of the book.

Cort Wesley said. Guillermo Paz said. Caitlin said. They all frickin full name (and middle names) said. Colonel, Ranger. Proper Noun capital of the world said. Dumb ass teenager carves a D in the floor and whooppeee everyone is so damn proud he ran away and was kidnapped. Cowboy story to the max but don't ask why...driving cars and not on horseback. Sheeeit.

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