What an abortion. Apparently this started online, the guy edits at Cracked. Way over the top-everything. One example is 'double vision in one eye'. Oh kay.
There is so much absurdity the reader (me) loses the desire to continue. One mindless episode of blood and gore to the next. So great a book he got offered many book deals, movie deals are crawling out his ass. Probably literally, that's how he writes. He writes as if he's taking a shit and is amused by everything dropping into the toilet. On and on. He seems smugly satisfied with the entire mess.
So what is it alias 'David Wong'? Aliens? The debbil? Alternate worlds? or a science project gone Wong? make up my mind because I'm tired of you trying to lead me around in circles. Actually it's almost unreadable until you get to chapter 8 where it finally calms down a tad and almost reads like a real book. I said 'almost'. It's still off the charts.
The online fans probably read a page a week or something and waited with bated breath for the next exciting bizarre installment but when it's all stapled together get the hell out of the way!
Way past Stephen King. There is nothing left to see or do in the gory department. Roach-built people, baby hands walking around on critter bodies sectioned invisibly in half, worm, snake and eel people. Blood everywhere. Dead people who mysteriously never existed. I mean really. Maybe you'll be one of the nutjob fans so pick it up and get started.
The narrator is such a drama queen the whole time I picture him as gay even tho he seems to have a girlfriend but in one part he goes down the cellar ahead of a girl and says this would "change his life forever." So they go down there look around, leave and um...his life is the same as before? LOL Drama-much? There is tons of that. It's like eating so much sugar you become diabetic.
BTW Wong, rural mailbox flags are put up by the home owner to alert the mailman he has a pickup. It's not put up to alert you to the mail, honey. I know there was no postage blahblah but it still makes you look all Homer-y.
AND somewhere a cellar "was never entered again until we burned it down' yet the house was definitely entered, maybe not the cellar and no burning down. There are a lot of leading things like that ending in a dead end. AND John didn't die at the end, apparently more of this shit is gonna fly in the future.
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